About Me

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I'm just a small-town girl who loves to read and write, often times listening to country music while doing so.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Exams

Now that June is here, the time is fast-approaching for students all across Ontario to prepare for final evaluations. The long, hard hours spent studying months of notes, listlessly rereading pages upon pages of information that may or may not appear on the year-end evaluations. It's EXAM time. How unnerving is that? Another year of school has passed in what seems like no time at all. Nine months of your life was just spent in a classroom, listening to your teachers drone on about their respective subjects. This year is the most significant of the four years spent in high school because it is my final year. These will be my final, last high school exams. In a month, it will be summer and I'll be free from high school. But where to go from there? Summer will be spent sleeping, reading, writing, and working. September will be time to head off to college and find a new job. School is ending, now the rest of my life is beginning.... And I'm not so sure what it will be like, but I am excited to find out.

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

ANIME NORTH

This past weekend, I spent my time in Toronto enjoying the celebration. The celebration in question was Anime North. For those of you who don't know what that is, Anime North is a convention for anime (Japanese cartoon) and manga (Japanese comic book) and other similar video games or cartoons to gather for a weekend of fun. Generally, people will make a costume, also known as a cosplay, and attend the festivities in their cosplay. The ticket is somewhat pricey ($50-$60), though it is a great experience. It is a good way to meet new people with whom you share similar interests, and the cosplays are always cool to look at. This year's event was held at the Toronto Congress Centre, with hundreds of vendors selling mangas, animes, plushies, food, art, and cosplays. Dances are held, music is played, and it is a weekend of fun and laughter. The best way to fully experience the convention and enjoy yourself is to rent a hotel room (there are many nearby because it is several blocks from the airport) with some friends and split the cost of the room. Three friends and I reserved a room in January and several hotels were already booked to capacity, so booking early is necessary. We had lots of fun meeting new people and seeing all the cosplays, we are even planning on attending next year. I would strongly recommend you attend as well if you are interested in anime or manga, or if your friends ask you to go. It was a great experience and I expect next year to be even better!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Doberman Pinscher

Several friends and I are looking into buying an apartment together, a three bedroom all inclusive if we can manage that. It's got me thinking, wishing really, that maybe we can get one that allows pets so that I can finally get that puppy I've always wanted. that red-brown Doberman Pinscher puppy with the rust markings and docked tail. My dream puppy, so to speak. But does that dream puppy have to be red or fawn? Of course not. A black or steel blue with rust markings would be fine by me. I've just always had this urge, a passion for Dobermans. I want my Doberman puppy, I yearn for that puppy. I even like Rottweilers. I like Rottys so much in fact that I would consider getting a Doberman-Rottweiler mix to give my Dobbie more muscle, making it broader and less likely to suffer from Wobbler's Syndrome.






Friday, May 6, 2011

Farmers: The Real Cowboys.

The men of the south are some of the most intriguing specimens I have come across: tans that radiate in the sun, bright eyes that glow in the afternoon rays, luscious locks of wind-messed hair, and muscles that are positively to die for. That is how the media portrays cowboys. Adonis-like men who slave the fields and bless the world with their picture-perfect figures. Who creates these images of gorgeous men who work hard to make a living? The media! Sure, there are those with tans and bulging muscles, but are they as perfect as the media portrays? Of course not, everybody has flaws, whether it be in personality or physical appearance of mental capacity.  So who are the real cowboys? Men who work the fields all day, too busy doing the chores and praying for God to answer their prayers and let their next crop bring in enough money to pay their bills. Those are the real, genuine cowboys, the ones who work hard all day under the blistering sun so that they can make enough to keep their house and feed their family. I find myself falling for the glamorized images of 'cowboys' with perfect tans and muscles the size of my thighs.. but they aren't the real deal. Real cowboys don't pretend to be who they're not, they simply work hard and live their lives with conviction. Ever heard a country song? Those are the real cowboys singing, they sing about the real hardships of life and what the farmers face each and every day with the rising sun. The hardships that come with working the farm, where their livelihood rests on the unpredictable weather which could drown or starve their crops. As you sit down for supper tonight, think about those farmers who produced your food. Who raised that chicken and that cow? Who grew those carrots and those peas? Say a little prayer for the farmers, the real cowboys, who worked all day so that you could sit down to your evening meal. The next time you find yourself loving those pictures of playboy cowboys from magazines, think of the real cowboys who deserve your respect and your thanks, because it's those everyday farmers who feed the cities with nothing but their calloused hands and the sweat on their brow.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Procrastination

Don't procrastinate! How many of us really know what procrastinate means? To me, it means simply to put off or to forget. Just leave it to the last minute, you have plenty of time. I've heard my parents tell me many times not to procrastinate, yet I continue to put things off until I am stuck in a blind rush to get it finished. So why do we procrastinate? For me it isn't that I don't want to do the work, because I know that it must be done and I have every intention of finishing it, but I get distracted very easily. I do all the planning but spend so much time on the planning, thinking that if the planning is perfect the resulting product will be too, that I procrastinate on making the essay or project into the masterpiece it should be. So how do you stop procrastinating? That's all a matter of perception. When you get a project, don't shove it to the back of your mind, start planning as soon as you get the instructions. If you start working on it right away, your mind will get into that working mode where you try and get things done all in one try. You won't get to that final good copy if you don't start working on it right away, I know from experience. Another tip is to set aside some specific days or times to work on it and remove yourself from distractions. For someone who enjoys networking and surfing Youtube, I know how hard it is to cut off the distractions, but it is possible. If you find yourself on Youtube getting distracted, create a playlist and let it play through while you work, music helps relax and if you are relaxed you may be more likely to do a good job. If music makes you want to dance however, turn all sound off so you don't get that distracting urge to bust out your moves. Is it Facebook that has you distracted? It distracts everyone, but the key is to know your limits. Fifteen to twenty minutes of Facebook time, and than close the browser, re-open it when you are finished with your work. Is is people talking to you through MSN or Yahoo? An easy way to fix that is to not even sign in because once you start talking, you may not want to stop. To effectively stop yourself from procrastinating first find out what is distracting you and work around that, eliminate that distraction from your work time. Another thing, figure out why you leave it to the last minute. Do you like the rush? Were you busy? Put aside time to work on the project and go through with that schedule. Treat it as work, because that's what it is. Would you willingly show up late for work and than not do anything? Probably not because you'd get fired. Well if you don't do any work on your project and throw it all together in a short amount of time, you are likely to get a failing grade. Train yourself to have effective work habits, something I need to work on as well. Just this week i was rushing to finish a twenty-five minute presentation as well as an eight page essay. I had a month to work on it, but I procrastinated until there was only a week left. Don't follow my mistakes, follow my advice. It is advice that I myself have trouble following, but I know it works because there are rare times when I have worked against my not-so-great working habits and those times result in very good grades.

James Wesley - Real



James Wesley is a one of a kind southern man with a voice that leaves you wanting more. Real is not a song about love and heartache, as my grandmother tends to describe the country genre, it is a song about life. It is a song that gives testimony to the hardships that everyday people are faced with, fighting to make a living, raising a child alone, living in fear, where every day is a constant struggle to make a living and to live. This song is not a song about getting drunk or high or having a good time, it is merely giving testimony to how fake the world is becoming. In the beginning stanza, reality shows are mentioned and put down as fake. It is true that many people watch reality shows, and that they are mislead into thinking that the events of the show, the drama and the struggle, are real and the people with their emotions are not acting. This song portrays the truth that the actors on reality shows are not being real, that the real reality show is the life going on around and that the real life struggles are the ones that people are facing each and every day. The song gives a voice to the unnamed farmers and soldiers who live their lives providing for others, whether they provide food or freedom, and get no thanks or recognition. The song portrays real life in an honest and upfront way that makes me rethink many of my actions and how I do overlook a lot of those little things that make reality worth living. The song makes me cry eight times out of ten, because of the message it sends: real is not what you see on TV, real is the life you are misjudging and taking for granted every day. So before I type my favourite part of the song that I believe sends the strongest message I will say this: don't take life for granted, because your life is precious and everybody is faced with struggles and conflict in life, have faith and know that there are people going through similar predicaments and help is always there when you ask for it.
Real, like too much rain fallin' from the sky
Real, like the drought that came around here last July
It's the damn boll weevils and the market and the weeds,
the prayer they're sayin' when they plant the seeds
And the chance they take to bring us our next meal"
- James Wesley, Real.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Four Steps to Gain Peace

Ever get that feeling that people are out to get you? Ever wonder why everybody seems to tick you off on one of those bad days? Are they out to get you? Or is it just your imagination running wild? I'm not here to answer those questions, but I do know some methods to helping calm those angry thoughts of yours on one of those bad days where everything seems to go wrong at the worst possible moments.

The first step: take a long, deep breath. I find that after getting some oxygen to those over-worked arteries, my blood pressure cools a bit. When your blood cools, so do your thoughts. Sometimes, all it takes is one deep breath to turn a bad situation into a good learning experience.

Step number two: talk about it. Ever wonder why your friends are there? It's to listen and advise you. You may even find that after talking about what made you made and why it made you mad your thoughts will simmer down and your anger disappears. That's because after talking about it, you release your feelings and let go of them, if you don't talk about your feelings they remain bottled up and build up even more negativity.

Step three: forget about it. Ever heard that saying "forgive and forget"? Well there is more wisdom in that than you may think. Don't roll your eyes, it is true. Let me put it this way: how can you be angry when you forget why you are angry? If you are angry, forgetting about what made you angry is a good way to get over it. So your sister wore your favourite skirt but did she ruin it? or sell it? Why remain angry when, at the end of the day, you get your skirt back. It sounds cheesy, but releasing your anger creates a peaceful state of mind.

Step four: forgive. This is the last step and by now you must be thinking I should be in the loony bin, but this advice does work. If you are angry at your best friend for kissing your crush, who is the one suffering from it? You are. Those sleepless nights where you seethe in anger at the two of them, you are the one hurting yourself. If you forgive them, than you can set your sights on someone else. If you hold onto your anger, you may do something stupid. By forgiving them, you are helping yourself. If you are brave enough to forgive someone for their wrongs, you end up the better person because you don't hold grudges or act out in a jealous rage. Need more encouragement to forgive? Forgiving your enemies for their misdeeds puts you in a better light.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Revealing Untold Secrets

Clinging to the rock-solid wall of my fantasy
Two hundred feet above an endless pit of doom.
To hold on is to continue with this delusion
But to release is to crumble in self-pity.
Relinquishing that ceaseless grip is the only option,
For though the journey downward will be perilous
The ground will break my fall.
It may very well break my spirit,
But at least reality will surround my soul.

The fluffy clouds appear soft to touch
Reaching out I'm left in despair
The imagination has created a world of wonder,
Perfection was within my grasp
But you wrenched it away with a silent tremor
And my heart prolongs unfastening the chains connecting you to me
My mind fights a battle of logic and wit,
For to believe is to deceive
As to pine for is to die for.

Just as the dog is torn between barking at a squirrel and following the orders of his master,
As a lion decides to attack the weaker calf or the meatier mother,
As the ant chooses to defend his colony or simply his queen,
I remain as indecisive as ever before
Torn between reality and fantasy,
Caught in the middle of a war between emotions and intelligence
Do I choose logic, the reasonable route?
Or desire, the corrupt daydream of the weary?

As sin corrupts the pure-of-heart,
It corrupts my mind.
As a lion mauls the antelope in the smouldering heat of the Savannah,
It mutilates my soul.
As a plane ruptured the peace of a nation one September day,
It pierces my heart.
To the icy frost clouding my vision,
The bitter cold of a Russian winter cannot compare.
As my blood-curdling thoughts of loathing force me to accept reality,
My broken trust and love are in an irreparable state of desolation.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Inner Beauty



I watched the movie Beastly with a friend and I was so drawn into the story that it took me a few days to figure out just why I loved the movie so much. Was it that the actor the movie was centered on was attractive? Or was there something more to my interest? The movie is an excellent example of how biased some people can be. Judging others based on looks alone is easy to do as it is looks that first attract you to another. However, that is no way to start a relationship. Beastly is an excellent example of how outer beauty may be what attracts you at first, but it is the inner beauty of another that should be the basis/foundation of a relationship. A relationship based on looks is shallow and lacking of any emotional connection, it is solely physical attraction that bonds you. Where would physical attraction take your relationship in ten years when your looks begin to change? The relationship would deteriorate and crumble at the slightest touch. A relationship fuelled by inner beauty however is one created on an emotional and intellectual connection, so is therefore stronger. If you are connection emotionally to another based on who they are as a person and not on what they look like, than you will be much happier in your relationship. Where could that take you in ten years? It is impossible to predict the future, but if a relationship is stronger when created on more than appearances than it is possible that the relationship could withstand many hardships and arguments that could arise. For it is not the appearance that connects two people in a relationship, it is a common emotional bond that ties you to another with an indestructible thread.

New Life

There is nothing more wonderful than a new child entering the world. Their first cry is not an annoyance as it may be five months down the road, rather it is a sign that life has been born. What is more natural, or more impressive, than the moment that child opens their eyes for the first time and looks at you with such clarity, as if they can see the inner workings of your mind. To me, nothing scares me more than holding a newborn, for they are so fragile, so delicate that I worry I may break them. Simultaneously, I feel such a warm pride and peace knowing that I am in the presence of pure innocence. Knowing that the grief of the world around has not affected such a beautiful being is surely a relief. For the innocence of children is pure and bright, like the first rays of sun at 5:30am on a cold summer morning. It is unrivaled in its simplicity and its beauty. Just the other day I was able to experience the joy of having a new nephew. He is the sweetest little thing I have ever seen, so breathtaking was the sight of seeing him sleeping that I could have cried. To witness the natural innocence of such a small creature was phenomenal and wildly refreshing. I felt as if the peaceful state in which he lay was contagious, for I felt an instant peace and the countless thoughts racing through my mind settled so that the only thing I could concentrate on was my nephew's sleeping face. When a person is pregnant it is easy not to consider their child as living just yet, but once they are born into the world and are there for all to see in their glorious form, it is impossible to deny them the gift of life. As I sit here in my classroom, I pray that my nephew remains healthy and innocent, and that his big sister (three years old) will welcome him into his new home today with an open heart just as she did the day of his arrival.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Jealousy

An emotion runs deep, burning so passionately that a friendship is ruined and relationship is savagely torn apart. It's fuelled by anger, by hate, by betrayal and it burns so strong that nobody can stop it. It's called jealousy and I know first-hand what it feels like to be on the receiving end of it. Just last night I witnessed a friend lash out at me because he was jealous, jealous of what he thought he had (me) but belonged to another (my boyfriend). He lashed out in anger, constantly accusing me of lying and insinuating that the feelings I have for my boyfriend are an illusion. It's depressing to think of how one jealous thought could have brought to life a passionate hatred, a hatred pointed at one's friend. A simple word, fairly easy to spell, has created such intense negative feelings that a once great friendship has ended in hatred. Jealousy. A word I hate, an emotion I loathe. Jealousy empowers those to do what they could not do previously: resent others for things they do not have. The most common form of jealousy in this world is that of wealth. Many are jealous and resent those who have wealth in the form of money, others despise wealth of another sort, the gift of being in a relationship. To be jealous of someone because they are with a person you believe you love is hard to deal with and nearly impossible to control. It is the strongest form of jealousy, it is a jealous rage that drives some to kill (whether it be themselves or another). A jealous drive that the world could do without. I resent jealousy, for it is something I have felt. I know the anger it fuels, and I resent that despicable feeling. Jealousy is useless, it alters your paradigms on life in a negative way and destroys your ability to love and trust. I would rather live my life with love, knowing that no matter how hurt I am I still have the capacity to care for others and to know that there are some who care for me as well. I would rather live in a world fuelled by love and compassion than one fuelled by jealousy and rage. But, we can't alter the inner beliefs/thoughts of anyone but ourselves. So, unless the world begins to cast out those wretched thoughts of hatred, there is nothing to be done about the state the world is in.

Did You Know?

Did you know... that on your computer the backslash ( \ ) indicates a folder name on your computer (ex. C:\Windows\System). The forward slash ( / ) indicates and option for a program and can be used when you need help with a command. It's pretty fascinating that two very similar forms of punctuation have two very different uses on your computer. http://www.teamits.com/connection/qa/slashes.html

Did you know... that no two people have the same DNA. Everyone has different features/characteristics in their DNA, and the closest you can get to being the same is identical twins, triplets, etc. though they are different because had they been the same they would think, look and do the exact same things (think of clones). It's pretty crazy, and really puts some emphasis on the fact that everyone is unique and different.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Make It or Break It



Make It or Break It is one of those rare shows you find when channel surfing that draws you in. Once you're hooked, you're hooked for life. The show is centered around four elite gymnasts and their struggle to make it onto the Women's National Gymnastics Team to reach their end goal of competing in the 2012 Olympics. The girls must face conflicts at home (ex. divorce, financial issues), teenage drama (ex. fighting over boys, juggling dating and work), and in their work at the gym (ex. one of the Nation Team Board Committee members hates the girls and tries to damage their careers).
The main focus of the show is the prestigious gym called The Rock and the three top gymnasts that reside there- Lauren Tanner, Kaylee Cruz, and Payson Keeler. In the first episode, a new girl from a humble background joins The Rock and quickly proves herself as a great gymnast. Emily Kimetko joins Kaylee, Payson, and Lauren in their training at the gym. While Kaylee struggles to keep her parents together and remain the top gymnast, Emily is pressured to do better at The Rock while trying to keep her job at the Pizza Shack to help her mother pay the rent, Lauren struggles with jealousy towards the other girls and a passion to always be number one, and Payson suffers an injury that nearly ends her career.
While there is a lot of drama and conflict in the show, there are many good qualities that it exemplifies, such as friendship, hard work and dedication. It is crazy to think how much dedication these girls give every day to be great gymnasts, the pressure to get there hardens them, the pressure to stay there nearly breaks them. The amount of hard work they put into mastering gymnastics took years of practice that is unfathomable. It really goes to show that everything worth having must be earned by hard work and perseverance.

Monday, February 28, 2011

The Cruel World of Facebook

Why is Facebook so addictive? Why are we so drawn to it? Why do we make up words associated with Facebook?
The answer is simple. As humans, we are drawn to everything that links us to other people. There is nothing glorious or fascinating about Facebook, but it links us to those we have connections with. Facebook allows us to keep in contact with our friends and family without actually making a connection. It is a way of taking the easy way out. Rather than picking up a telephone and calling your second cousin, you can "poke" them on Facebook and feel satisfied that your relationship has been rekindled. It is pointless to think that we can maintain a relationship without physically being with the person. Relationships aren't based on merely talking to a person, we must be there for them emotionally as well as physically. Facebook lures us into this "safe-zone" where we mistake friendly curiosity for affection. We even create words or phrases to show our appreciation for Facebook. Often times, the phrase "I Facebooked you last night" can be heard between friends in the hallways of the school. How well can we know people if we base their life around their Internet usage? If someone does not go on their Facebook for a week and their status becomes blank from inactivity we lose our connection to them. Is it really that hard for us to talk to the person in person rather than on the Internet? It is easy to be deceived over the computer because you can't see the facial expressions or hear the tone of someones voice when they say "happy birthday." Are they really wishing you well? Or are they merely saying that so you don't get snippy with them the next day? Facebook is just another distraction in our relationships, it lures us into a false security. Eventually, we could abandon our interactions with people in the real world and base relationships on our interactions over Facebook and the Internet. Anyone feel like boycotting Facebook now?

Friday, February 18, 2011

Texting

Why is texting so important in society today? It seems as if it is a lifeline to the outside world, a link to those around us. It isn't though, it is just an easy way to contact those who are not in your immediate vicinity, a simple way to talk to them without uttering a word. To me, it is somewhat of a crazy obsession that i try to stop at every turn but never succeed in curing myself of the need for it. It is pure nonsense, and yet my hands are so familiar, so in-tune with it, that I can't seem to help myself. Every time I hear the zzzttt of the vibration or catch a glimpse of the screen lighting up, I reach for it without hesitation, not knowing what it says but feeling some sort of connection to the words nonetheless. It is almost like my mind has bonded with it, as if mind and phone have become intertwined. Absurd and pathetic, I know. What gets me most though, is the fact that nothing I do seems to be able to curb this unknown fascination with the cellular device. Nothing interesting really comes out of the texting conversations, so there isn't any real reason to get excited. Maybe it is because, during the day, it is my only way of contacting my boyfriend. He lives eightteen hours away, so any conversation we have is sweet, in a simple sort of way.  It is our only means of communication, until night-time when we talk on the phone. He is the only one I end up texting. It used to be that I would text a friend sitting right beside me, those unspoken words that cannot be said in the presence of others. As time passed, however, and I became more familiar with it, I became bored. I stopped texting my friends, unless they messaged me first. It brought a time of peace, a sense of accomplishment for me. I had overcome my texting obsession! Well, not quite. I still text my boyfriend, almost religiously it seems, but even that has its limits. I don't text in class or during work, so we are limited to the time between classes and during lunch. After school is a time of constant messages, until the time we both head off to work. After work, the only text message I receive is one giving me permission to call my boyfriend, an acknowledgement that if I want to talk to him rather than read a short version of what he wants to say, that I may do so. After that, the phone gets plugged into the charger, and is not picked up until morning. Yet it remains on all week, as I do not own an alarm clock so my phone serves as one.When the weekend comes, the phone gets turned off before bed, so that nothing may interfere with my rest.When I first started texting, I thought it was the coolest thing in the world, but now I have lost that childish interest in it and use it only when necessary. I text my mother and my boyfriend, nobody else. Aside from those times, it remains in my purse, lonely and awaiting the time when I may rekindle the bond. If I have my way, the bond will continue to deteriorate as I grow older, as more important aspects of life distance me from the frivolous activity of texting.

Followers